'But wots this!' I hear you exclaim, the pie and mash club going for a sandwich? Don't panic — don't even picnic — the lunch bunch from Waterloo had only one thing on their minds: pie and lots of it.

The destination this dismal grey Friday afternoon was Peter's of Shadwell, home to probably the largest collection of chalk blackboards in East London. On offer was a dizzying variety of exotic foodstuffs, as well as the full range of pie and mash options. Which on this occasion was pie and mash, as the eels had run out.

Shown here in full mash, the charming and friendly Sarah, who with colleague Nicky catered to our every whim and foible.

A group of teachers, clearly at home among the blackboards, were enjoying a Friday lunchtime fry-up whilst we awaited our comestible consignment. Our spirits were leavened by the first appearance this season of Tom Leader, the man who's never far from a salt beef sandwich.

Alan Terry was already in situ and in progress, having pedalled furiously up Cable Street from the financial quarter on his 'iron steed' [seen tethered outside the shop in the picture above]. You have to get up pretty early in the morning to beat this chap to a pie.

I haven't got a close-up of Jason Sharp, but his sartorial theme on this occasion was a cross between classic roll-neck era Steve McQueen and the 'Milk Tray Man'. How about the 'Pie Tray Man'? Jason was accompanied by Club newcomer David Arkle. He shares his surname with the greatest steeplechaser of all time, and the first horse to receive public acclaim outside racing circles. Surely it can only be a matter of time before one of our own thoroughbred pie chasers earns a similar reputation?

After some convivial banter, the plates started to land one-by-one on the formica runways, like a squadron of shimmering UFO's.

'Fast Eddie' Mosse was on hand with his super-8 to capture each emanation of steam.

For some the weight was unbearable, but at 7lbs it was just enough to prop open the shop door and let out the accumulated hot air.

Each platter was gratefully received and truly thanked for, amen. Praise be!

Tom Leader, seen here in jaw-dropping form, racking up the season's highest individual score thus far. Could he be the Arkle of Pie and Mash?

Apple pie and custard ensued; Dominic Mattos was close to tears of joy from the abundance of heartwarming and homely nourishment.

Our talented pie chef Callum came forth from the kitchen for a photo-call. He should be proud — we are.

St Attus,

Patron Saint of Pies