Good Friday engineering work put the kibosh on our proposed trip to Walton-on-the-Naze, but spirits were buoyed by an April Fool's pie replacement service. Offered up by Manze's of Chapel Market, this was certainly a popular choice with local lad Big Al Smith. I can only imagine his awesome beard had come off for Lent, and I am hoping for a fully follicled Roy Wood revival come the autumn. You might want to put on your shades before checking out Woody's wonderful website here.

Jason Sharp dug his spoon in with gusto, stealing a march on absent antipod pies-fighter Tony Ruello. This was Sharp's first visit to Manze's Islington branch and he was 'delighted by portion size and pie quality'.

My marble slab-mates were both representing ISGPLC, a company which is getting a great deal of valuable advertising in this prominent corner of the internet. If this were Formula 1, they would be winning the 'Constructor's Championship'.

It was wet tyre conditions for the eel fancier. The stewed supply had expired, leaving only the jellies - a much more slippery undertaking. Luckily we didn't have to wear leather safety suits and helmets emblazoned with sponsors.

Your domed statistician.

Potter gives a half-Cheshire for the lens. For some reason, 'Is Vic There' came up, with himself describing the electrifying Department S gig he'd recently witnessed at the 100 Club. Conversation turned into a new-wave nostalgia trip down memory lane. Sharp later remarked; "I was intrigued to discover that the core of the club membership are ex-punks although with hindsight, not entirely surprised. Shaw Taylor would certainly have arrived at this conclusion some time ago given the proliferation of army greens, face jewellery and brothel creepers at a typical meet. I was touched by how naturally my chum Dave fitted into the circle, providing the name of the second of the Members hits as if 1978 was yesterday and regaling us with an eel filled rendition of "is Vic there?" '

"The pies are done, the mash is mellow and there's liquor on my eels . . . say, is Rikk there?" Yes, the leather-clad ex-champ and former Numanoid put in a solid showing as preparation for the long trip back to his adopted homeland of Wales. There's tidy.

Far right: Paul Grice. The world of chartered accountancy may not realise this lad's value as an ex-pat Northerner who has 'taken the Pie'. I am hoping Paul might be able to devise an excel-lent spread sheet to automate the meticulous manual mathematics I perform for the league. Even if it means I have to say 'Grice' before each meal: 'For what we are about to compute, may the total equal the sum of the parts and be ordered from the greatest to the most humble, Amen.'

David Arkell accepted an incoming call with nonchalance par excellence, the five point penalty effortlessly absorbed into his towering tally. If I was Len Wilcock I'd feel chafed to the lobes with this outrageous display.

Nevertheless Dave's mash-free pie pile-ups have firmly established him as the Big Daddy of the league this season.

Manze's Original Mirrors. Could this be Heaven?

Grice and Lucas outside no.74.

The outside of no.72. Unfortunately for the Pie and Mash Club demographic — trend chasers to a man - this shop caters for ages 0-10.

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