Take me home please
Pie & Mash Shop, Upper Wickham Lane, Welling
Season 2014-2015

Statto's log, stardate 20-02-2015:
As part of our ongoing mission to explore strange new shops, seek out new pies and to boldly go where no club has gone before, our enterprising 'away team' were beamed into the township of Welling for a February Friday food-finding foray. Just off the high road, we found a humble edifice standing doughtily in a small parade of shops on Upper Wickham Lane. In all probability we were no more than one nautical mile from Kenroy's in Bexleyheath, which outpost we visited just over a year ago.

Stewed eels were in plentiful supply, thus giving Mike G. opportunity to apply his newfound squishable Thai chili sauce.

Of course the purists among you will mock, but the combination works well with the cooking-stock and is a popular starter with the club.

The popular way to conclude a basinful.

Here's a superb aerial view of a 'three and one' before demolition.

Chris Charalambous' elliptical platter featured a veritable embankment of mash; the mountainous formation was merely a double portion.

Judith Deschamps has a fondness for spicy condiments. She was seen turning up the heat on her pie lid.

The mere presence of Edward Wasp is enough to leaven the doughiest dinner date.

These days I reach for the chili vinegar when the pies arrive. These gold-topped specimens certainly looked great. I thought the filling had a rugged, outdoors flavour – almost gamey, and entirely to my liking.

The Two J's ensconced themselves in the central reservation and proceeded to tuck in with alacrity. They were joined on the marble by an intrepid reporter: meet Mairi Mackay, feature writer for the internet arm of CNN News. She was researching for her next piece, and trying the ambrosial scoff-of-the-gods for the first time.

In keeping with the traditional theme of our gathering, Mairi conducted her interviews with the time-honoured journalistic tools of pen and paper. Read Mairi's final article here.

The distinctive boatrace and titfer of Tom Leader ranged themselves genuflectively at the counter. For the man from Shooters Hill, the locale was within, er, shooting distance.

Sue Madigan closed her mouth for this shot. It doesn't happen often.

Local historians of note, sampling a slice of 'living history'.

Here too was Ian Burr, an unrepentant Northerner unable to forego his mushy peas and gravy.

As you might expect, Mike G's orientation was more southerly.

These splendid people in chequered aprons enabled our enjoyment. Pictured: Laura [left], Kim [right] and Kevin [far right].

Husband and wife team Kevin and Kim have run this shop for 14 years; Laura was a customer who came to work for them 11 years ago. Between them they have a wealth of experience in dealing with 'all sorts'.

[Click here for the shop's website.]

'Comfort puddings' is a term I came across only recently. I believe these fall into that category. Respectively: treacle pud and custard; spotted dick and ice cream.
Naturally both featured in the Charalambous dessert course. 'Gone in 60 Seconds' comes to mind.

Regular readers of this column will know that Mike's an eminent Who-ologist. With this tardicious calendar – a gift from Sue Madigan – he'll be Lord of Time for the rest of 2015.

You'll see there's a degree of diversification-n-chips on the menuboard.

The post-lunch assembly on Upper Wickham Lane.

If you're leaving town on the New Cross Turnpike, it's well worth a left turn at the traffic lanterns.